If you would like to snag some yummy recipes & NOT read about life in the final stages of the adoption process- Click Here, enjoy & happy cooking!
As for the rest of you...
I am lacking for words in how to describe what I'm feeling after my third week off work and still waiting for baby girl to make an appearance. The logical part of my brain knows that we are in week 37 and that Mama L has had two babies at 37 weeks BUT also two at 38. The feelings side of my brain wants to find a way to have Mama L move in with us so I can just stare at her until it's time to go to the hospital.
So there you have it.
Leaving work was super exciting and I have gotten boat loads accomplished these last few weeks. I am incredibly grateful I've had this time. It feels like I am turning a page in this book that is my life and starting a new chapter. Nothing but blank pages ahead. The writer & adventurer in me feels ecstatic. The soon to be mama in me feels completely crazy. I think this is really the first time in our adoption where I've felt something I didn't really expect to feel toward Mama L...envy.
If I'm being honest I have to admit that I hate relying on Mama L for baby updates. Is she kicking? What about contractions? What did the doctor say? How many centimeters are you at now? It takes EVERYTHING inside of me to not pepper her with a billion questions every time we talk (text). Every time my phone chirps I swear I have a minor seizure (partially in anticipation for THE call and partially because this is the first time in ages I have turned my ringer on from vibrate). This last stage of the adoption, like all the others, is teaching me to release, release, release. To cast all my cares upon Him. To put all my eggs in my Jesus basket and keep depending on Him for peace, clarity, assurance, and the words to share with Mama L. This is easily the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. How I wish I could feel our daughter kicking and squirming inside my belly. Not having a huge desire to be pregnant myself, I didn't expect to feel that way. My heart aches to meet her, my arms ache to hold her, and my mind aches from exhaustion...feels excited about the baby coming- then nervous about the delivery- then scared about being responsible for her care in the hospital, when she could still be taken away- then nerves about having an infant- then prayer, giving it to God- then peace, so much peace- then excitement...You get the picture. It is a beautiful thing learning to rely on God with all that you have. It is beautiful and stretching and wonderful and peaceful and exhausting all in one. I have no idea how people survive without Him. It is baffling.
Here I am, waiting. With anticipation, full of hope, excitement, and muddled anxiety. With most of my home projects and nesting finished this week I've been focusing more on my mind-body-soul care. I have my bag ready to take to the hospital, and I opted not to pack my bible. I feel like the likelihood of me having moments of solitude and bible time while I'm there is a big fat 0. I'll be supporting Mama L through her delivery and then taking care of her baby. So I decided to make some note cards. This has been incredibly calming and supportive and helpful to me this week. Resting in scripture, copying important verses down onto note cards, and then writing my prayers on the back. I think this might be something I continue to do periodically in life. I will for sure be taking these note cards with me to the hospital & then keeping them in my diaper bag forever! Here's the thing: I love our amazing community, family & support system we have in our life. Incredible. Unmatched, I think. With wonderful words of encouragement and advice to offer. Honestly. So appreciated and wouldn't change a thing. But I realized a few months ago, if I am not so incredibly ingrained in the word, abiding in Jesus, and taking care of myself....I am screwed. I have to get those things first to be the best mom I can be, to be used by Jesus, to be a fruitful branch of the vine.
Note cards!
Try it out. I wager...it will change your life. It being the bible.
Next up...mmmm, breakfast tacos! Recipes! But first- homemade tortillas!
Food, cooking, creating recipes- it is a love language for me. I love feeding people and I love making yummy things. This week I was all about making my own tortillas. Anyone that knows me knows that Mexican or any Latin-american inspired food is my FAV. Lucky for me Trav enjoys it too and thus it often overpowers our weekly menu. I really wanted to master making my own tortillas because I don't do traditional flours, and while I like corn tortillas the homemade ones I've had while traveling or with friends have always been SO much better than store bought.
We had a group of friends over on Tuesday night for fajitas so I decided to give it a whirl (I don't buy into the bunk that you shouldn't try new recipes out on guests. Whoops!) All you need to make your own tortillas is:
1. Masa flour (pictured here; I got mine from our Walmart, but we live in a very diverse area so our Walmart has lots of ethic food/ingredients. If not at your local grocery, try a hispanic grocery store)
2. Griddle or large skillet
3. Warm water
4. Either a tortilla press or a flat-bottomed skillet or plate
5. Parchment paper
We do NOT have a tortilla press, although now I kind of want one. I opted to use one of our flat skillets to press the tortillas. I simply used the recipe found on the back of the masa flour bag. The recipe below includes instructions for using a flat-bottomed skillet or plate. If you DO have a tortilla press you would simply use that with parchment paper to form your tortillas, and then plop them on the griddle.
Corn Tortillas (makes 12)
1. Mix 2 cups of Masa flour with 2 cups of warm water in a large mixing bowl.
2. Stir until well combined or for about 4 minutes.
3. Heat griddle or skillet at 450 degrees (our griddle only gets to 400, so it just took longer)
3. Grease griddle and place sheet of parchment paper down
4. Use a scoop (I used an 8oz scoop) to put batter onto parchment.
5. Place another sheet of parchment paper down on top of batter scoops.
6. Use flat-bottomed skillet to evenly smash down batter to form tortillas.
7. Once tortillas are shaped, slide the bottom piece of parchment out from under them.
8. Then, slowly peel the top parchment off so tortillas are the only thing on the griddle.
9. Cook until golden brown then flip!
For all you Visual Learners out there:
Steps 3 & 4- Grease griddle, lay parchment, scoop batter.
They are SO easy and SO tasty, especially served warm. I expect that if kept in the fridge they would stay good for about 3 days...but so far we have not had any leftovers! Full disclosure: that Tuesday night Trav made the tortillas...he had a knack for it. But this morning, I was craving some huevos rancheros tacos so I whipped some up!
Mexican Breakfast Tacos (makes 3-4)
1. Follow recipe above for homemade corn tortillas.
2. Mix together 2 eggs with 1/4 cup of "Texas caviar" and a Tbs of plain greek yogurt.
****Texas Caviar= 1 can black beans, 1 can corn, 1 diced tomato, 1/2 diced red onion, cilantro to taste, dash of salt/pepper, 1 tsp cumin, 1 tsp ground red pepper, juice of 1 lime.****
3. Scramble egg mixture over medium heat until fully cooked.
4. Scoop scrambled eggs into corn tortilla
5. Garnish with fresh tomato, cilantro, cheese, dollop of plain greek yogurt & hot sauce.
SO YUM!!
Enjoy!
With that, I'm off to work on my note cards & charge my phone. :)
Love, Hannah
